Tough decisions, for a beaten up guy

Nice pictures, they all hit home and give me a smile and piece of sadness too, but this post is a big reality check, I am here AND IT LOOKS SCARY, and I am not sure I can do this, PHYSICALLY.
Mentally no problem, but much more than driving is needed out here and I am not getting in shape like I thought I could, worse actually, guess OTR may be the only option for now, and honestly I DO NOT WANT TO DO THIS EITHER, which leaves me where, living in my car and no, REPEAT, NO PROSPECT OF HOUSING , SO WHAT NOW??? 

Not sure actually, suggestions, anyone, I know Man Up and get to work, I am trying, but then I am getting all the construction drivers applying for Oil jobs now with winter coming, and most are getting them but many are now not with housing, as the housing jobs are filled , but when you think about it, of course they are, so keeping at it, but seriously looking at OTR job from Grand Forks, but lucky to get 500-600 a week if that, instead of , 1000-2500 a week, but then maybe not as hard either, nor as many hours,  naw bull dookey, I will do 70 hrs with either situation, who we kidding....

Gotta go